Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Broad of the Month- Kim Kardashian

We love her for all the wrong reasons--- Cheers to the Ms. Kardashian, our Broad of the Month....

Who She Is: Kimberly Noel Kardashian is the part Turkish-Armenian/ part Russian /part Scottish/ part Dutch daughter of OJ Simpson attorney Robert Kardashian and Kris Jenner (who is married to Olympian Bruce Jenner). She is also a former friend to Paris Hilton. But our fair Kimmy made a name all her own when she starred in a home made sex tape with Z list pseudo-rapper Ray J ( better know as Moesha's brother).

Why We Love Her: Most of us would have ran and hid under our bed for a grazillion years after having to admit to doing the dirty with Brandy's little bro, but not our Kimmy. This chick stood proudly, posed ass front for pics, and got herself a reality show.... and a second season of said reality show, and a third, and a clothing line, and a million appearance fees, and the coveted cover of Playboy, and a nice little $5 million settlement from aforementioned sex tape scandal. $$$KA-CHING$$$
It took Jenna Jameson and Tracy Lords years of tenacity and back breaking work (pun intended) to crossover from porn glory to mainstream. But for Kim the transition was complete in less than 18 months.
Talk about landing on your feet...

And who in god's name rebounds from Ray J with Reggie "Please never put your shirt on again" Bush (pictured above alongside his love)? Did we mention that Reggie signed a contract that could be worth 62 million smackers in 2006 with the New Orleans Saints? They are discussing marriage...
Why buy the cow if Ray J milked it for free???- Because clearly she has some unworldly "gifts".

And the body... All breast, lips, hips and thighs, she is a beacon of hope for voluptuous women everywhere.

Extra Credit: We have seen the sex tape. And if we were stupid/crazy/drunk enough to humiliate ourselves, embarrass our families and shame our dead father's good name by making a sex tape with the wackness himself Mr. Willie "Ray J" Norwood, we hope, NO PRAY, we look half as fabulous as she does in it. Who the hell has that type of lighting in an amateur porn? Did Kevin Aucoin himself rise from the dead to do her makeup? Not our fav bra and panty set in the very beginning- but hey, we all make mistakes... Say what you want about Kim but she is photogenic.

In 2000, at the age of 20, Kardashian married music producer Damon Thomas; their relationship ended in divorce in 2004.

Kimmmmmmy, we love you and want to become besties. And we are ready, willing, and able to get you out of those boring black bras that you wear in every photo shoot. We have some great Turkish lingerie worthy of your heritage and some fab brazilian tangas perfect for your lovely tush.

Holding you in highest esteem,
Dames and Broads

1 comment:

Pedro Garcia Millan said...